You are probably familiar with the positive effect that a nice and a supportive word can have on you when someone gives you a compliment or recognition for a certain action you did or gives you encouragement in a difficult moment …
Words can make a huge difference on you, on your day and to others.
In my last article, I started to explore the subject of how our attention moves along an imaginary line where “pleasures and accomplishments” are at one end and “obligations and duties” on the other.
When our attention gets stuck on the “obligations” side, automatic repetitions are always involved in this change of perception. We start to notice only “what we have to do” and if we don’t pay attention, we can find ourselves forgetting our intention: why are we actually doing what we are doing?
Words participate to create this dynamic. For example notice how many time at day we use “I have to do” “I should do” “I need to do”…. And notice what kind of energy those sentences transmit.
You may say that they are just describing real situations where we have to or we should or we need to. And you would be right. But all these are referring to only an aspect of the situation, to “the duties and the obligations”.
What about our intention, our motivation, our excitement, our love?
By paying attention to the way we use the language, we can give more space to those qualities.
How? By paying attention to use more “I want to” “I plan to” “I decide to” instead to “I have to do” “I should do” “I need to do”.
During the work with my clients, I observed many times that this change reduces their level of stress, the sensation of feeling a victim and the heaviness of having to perform non-stop.
This change also helps to take responsibility back and to ask yourself some questions when you find yourself in tight corner. You can not always change the situations you meet in your life. But you can influence your attitude while facing them.
So keep introducing some changes in your habits!
- Start to notice how many time you use “I have to do” “I should do” “ I need to do” while speaking with someone or within yourself.
- Then notice the effect of those obligations on your body paying attention to the level of: stress, heaviness, lack of motivation and energy.
- Finally start to substitute them with: “I want to” “I plan to” “I decide”. Notice the effect of using them on your body.
Contact me if you need support in working with the power of words!