Some weeks ago, I found an interesting article about an “honesty journal” experience, that the writer Judi Ketteler (*) was keeping for the last 7 months. In the article, she was sharing how challenging it was to keep the intention to say the truth: answering questions about death to her 6 years old daughter, exposing frustration or dissatisfaction in relationships or more general, risking hurting people’s feelings.
I feel very close to her challenge as I’m also practicing the truth… especially to myself 🙂
Even if the topic was known to me, her article nourished my own reflection about facing our fears : the fear of hurting other people and the risk to lose them.
Why is it important to recognise that sometimes, it is easier NOT to be honest? What is the problem about the bits and pieces of perceptions that we prefer to ignore so to not cause issues and to keep it smooth and easy?
Actually, this strategy is not so good, because it doesn’t really help to keep it smooth and easy.
If we look at honesty as the ability of being aligned with what is true for us, despite the discomfort we experience inside us or through the others, not being honest means to ignore what we perceive. And that has always a negative impact on us but also in our relationships, as it requires from us to invest energy pretending that something is not how it actually is.
Ms. Ketteler mentions, in her article, some researches where people were asked to consciously stop lying, also those little innocents lies that we keep saying for social reasons. They have experienced an improvement in their physical and psychological health during this time. Fascinating, isn’t it?
If you would like to challenge yourself by practicing honesty, I can recommend keeping an “honesty journal”. You can start by observing where, in your daily life, you ignore some bits and pieces of your perception so to have safe and easy interactions with others. You will be surprised about what you will discover!
I will talk more about the “honesty journal” in my next article!
Contact me if you wish to share your outcome and if you would like to have some support in dealing with the emotions that may arise within you.
(*) “Honesty, to be Happier”, Judi Ketteler, The New York Time International Edition, 22.09.17
Picture by Michelle Sabatini, Sardegna